The Drunken Baseball Psychic

A story from the baseball twilight zone

The Woodbury Heights High School varsity baseball team finally made it to the State Semi-finals for the first time in eleven years. It was no thanks to Garrett Rondowski, arguably the worst player on the team. It was a miracle that Garrett was even on the team.

Thanks to injuries incurred by a couple of other players, Garrett made the team at the beginning of the season. He was essentially a utility bench warmer who was only occasionally called upon to play. It was in the very first game of the season that Garrett was called on to pinch hit for the pitcher in the bottom of the ninth inning with the bases loaded. The team was down by three runs.

At this point in the game Garrett was the only player left on the bench. As he walked up to the plate the rest of the team let out a collective sigh of resignation. Garrett was a terrible hitter and everyone on the team immediately felt that the game would be lost.

But to everyone’s surprise — especially Garrett’s — he belted a grand slam home run over the left field fence and the team won. The worst player on the team suddenly became the team’s hero from game one.

But it did not last. Garrett never got another hit for the rest of the season. He ended the regular season going one for…