Giving Advice

It can be a truly sucky job or it can be enlightening

On an average work day I give advice to between 20 and 50 people. I have been giving advice to people for several decades in one capacity or another. Long ago, it used to excite me — especially when I got positive feedback. It empowered me — or perhaps I should say it empowered my ego. Now I do it mostly just to pay the freaking rent.

I used to really care. I cared if the person took my advice to heart. I cared if they implemented my advice. I cared if my advice made a positive impact on their lives. I cared if they bothered to thank me. I cared if my advice was really appropriate and perfect. I cared whether or not I was truly helping.

But over the many years I realized that there was a difference between caring and loving. Loving is a heart function while caring is usually a brain/ego function. When you care you are mentally and emotionally invested in a response. When you truly unconditionally love, any response is immaterial.

I used to really, really care. But now I try to only really, really love.

It’s a very subtle difference.

Over the years I’ve had thousands of people come to me for advice. After giving them my advice many of them laugh, never consider my advice, and then never come to me for…