Cigarettes and Peaches
A strange discussion about direction
If you only smoke one cigarette a year chances are good that you will enjoy the hell out of that one cigarette. But if you smoke more cigarettes the enjoyment with each one goes down and habit rears its ugly head.
But what if I had just two cigarettes a year? One during the first six months of the year and one for the last six months of the year?
Gosh darn, I hate calendars. I’m sure two smokes a year could be quite joyful but neither of them will be as ultimately joyful as one a year. It’s simple math.
So what about people who never smoke any cigarettes all year?
Well, they just don’t know what they’re missing.
So when was the last time you had a smoke?
Oh my. Let’s see… I think it was about three or four years ago. I don’t remember how I even got hold of a lone cigarette. Anyway, I went home with it to find that I had no lighters or matches in my home. I lit the thing on the gas stove. I singed one eye brow just a little bit. I sure enjoyed the hell out of that smoke.
So you haven’t kept up your one smoke a year deal?
Oh hell, that’s not my deal. I just made that up.
